Four Philosophers, Bill Schmalfedt Get Poop in Mail; No Connection Believed*


When Sally Haslanger, a prominent feminist philosophy professor at the Massachusetts Institute of Technology, returned to her Cambridge office in August after a summer abroad, she found a padded envelope with no return address waiting for her.

She opened the package while sorting through her other junk mail and stuck her hand inside to feel what was there.

“Then I thought, ‘Oh shit,’” Haslanger said. “‘This is shit. I’m one of the other people who got the shit!’”

MIT’s Environmental Health and Safety team confirmed that the substance was feces, according to a university police report. But Haslanger wasn’t as confounded as one might expect a well-respected philosopher to be when faced with a mysterious package of poop. That’s because three other philosophers also received shit in the mail last summer.


When internet trolls get, or send themselves poop, that’s bad.  Now that philosophers are involved, I consider this a crisis.  

Dave Alexander, Philosopher and Presidential Historian


*Other than the fact that Schmalfeldt has also received, or ordered poop…there probably is no connection.  The man is positively click-bait!

There’s this guy  Brian Leitner, who has written a ranking of philosophy departments (number 12 is jaw-dropping!)  and some are blaming him.  It might also be a frame-up. Naturally, one of the philosophers thinks that even if it WAS NOT Leitner who sent the poop, it should be blamed on him.

The Times:   (Oh, hell yeah the New York Times is on it.  Like flies on poop.)

In an interview, Ms. Jennings said she couldn’t be sure that Mr. Leiter was involved but that the incident still reflected on him.

“It’s another thing coming from his direction, whether it’s from him or another person supporting him or an enemy of his,” she said. “The only reason I would be getting this is because he’s decided to make a mockery of my work.”

That’s some high grade poop there.

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4 Responses to Four Philosophers, Bill Schmalfedt Get Poop in Mail; No Connection Believed*

  1. Jonesy says:

    Well, ‘Dave Alexander, Philosopher and Presidential Historian’, I hope you are happy. I am cleaning my HP Computer Screen from the drink of coke I took just before reading the following:
    “That’s because three other philosophers also received shit in the mail last summer.”
    Now I’m having a shitty time!



    Liked by 2 people

  2. Paul Krendler says:

    Did someone say “mockery?”


    Liked by 1 person

  3. Dr_Mike says:


    “Stand-up phillosopher.”

    “Oh, a bull-shit artist.”

    Liked by 1 person

  4. onwyrdsdream says:

    are “a prominent feminist philosophy professor” and “a well-respected philosopher” supposed to refer to the same person? Because I’m not sure how that would be possible.


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